Boy Statement by
Bastian Cole Durham
"I want to do something different." That's what I decided
after looking, and looking in awe mind you, at all of the gorgeous
Actually, my first thought was, 'I want to be an XX Boy,' and I started
taking edgy, modern, fashion pictures of myself in urban landscapes.
I couldn't quite pull it off, though. Kael captures moments of reality
and his pictures have so much depth and energy. Mine looked staged,
posed, flat, and frozen in time. I was an XX Boy wannabe. So, of
course, the only way to be an official XX Boy was to have Kael come
down to North Carolina (which is where for some strange reason I
currently live,) and take pictures of me and a few other NC guys.
And he actually did! So I drew a skull and crossbones on the back
of my notebook and waited for him at the airport. When he arrived,
I was so excited and nervous I couldn't stop talking. All I talked
about were my ideas for photos.
I want to do something different," I said. "All the guys
in your pictures look so tough. I'm not tough."
Kael replied in his endlessly sexy Parisian accent, "You can
be princess if you want."
Initially, I wanted to take him to my dance studio. I thought we
could do some interesting things with the bar, the mirrors, and the
pink wall. That fell through because the studio was closed that day.
So there went all my hopes of looking like some sort of transman
Balanchine dancer god.
My only other idea was to have hot trannyfag sex in a dirty bathroom.
I wanted some trannyfag visibility and the dirty bathroom was just
because Kael seems to like them. So this idea, of course, fell through
as well. Something came up with my fellow model and he couldn't do
the shoot, so I'd have to fly solo.
In the end, I think this turn of events was fortunate. I think my
solitude was important to the pictures to get my personality in them.
I am different than a lot of guys in this area. I am the only trannyfag,
and it seems like I'm the only one unpartnered. This causes a problem,
since the guys are primarily monogomous and hetero.
So I think Kael captured more of me than I even expected. I find
it awesomely empowering.
There I am, flying it solo, and I look good. I look happy. I am happy.
The search for friends and partners down here can be frustrating
at times, but it's okay. I know I'm a nice guy, and I'm not bad-looking
either. See, here's a picture.
images and content copyright © Joshua Cole 2007.
All Rights Reserved.